I was being stationed at the M1 Shop last Sunday, promoting a phone I know close to nothing about (haha), and I people-watched.
I came to a conclusion that human beings are fundamentally guilty of one thing – taking things for granted.
Kids were whining for a new phone, eagerly wanting a queue number, and when their turn is called, they’d wave to their dad and summon them over with a “oei” or “eh, come!”. How rude and disrespectful.
I thought if they want the phone so bad, is it so hard to settle it themselves with the staff? Turned out they simply needed their parents to pay for the phone. Hah. This is how spoilt youths these days have become. Will they ever know the value of working for what they want?
And then there were couples… girlfriend obviously not interested in anything but boyfriend was walking off alone having the time of his life trying out phones. One of the girls actually tried to help her guy, asked me to introduce the phone to her, said he boyfriend is looking for a phone. Turned out he wasn’t appreciative of her efforts to help at all. He said he already had in mind a certain brand, what for she go and waste his time and ask him to go see another brand. I could sense how hurt she was.
That got me thinking about love.
It’s always upsetting to see one party willingly subjecting him/herself to misery while the other is oblivious to how much harm and hurt s/he has caused.
A couple’s needs aren’t always equal.
One person’s needs can be bigger, stronger or more urgent. To me, a mature, loving, supportive relationship means that sacrifices are made, concessions are given and needs are prioritised.
Most times, relationships are less than ideal. You can easily tell who is the one loving the other person more. They are the ones who don’t mind giving so much till the extent they’re being cruel to themselves.
But I guess that’s the thing about unconditional love – to know your heart is big enough to love despite the sacrifices, humble enough to find joy in another’s joy, graceful enough to smile through the tears and wise enough to see the meaning of it all.
***
Tonight, I got myself thinking about life.
We would always tell each other to live life for the moment to the fullest, but how many of us hang on to our past and never let go? I’ve been told that I am a person who is decisive, tough and move on very quickly from closures of my past relationships. Come to think of it, is it that hard to do what I do?
Our time is limited. Once people recognize this, many of their decisions will change. What is the point of pacing back and forth, but not moving forward?
Most days I will ask myself, if today were the last day of my life, would I wanna do what I am about to do today? When I ask myself that question, almost everything will fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Everything else is secondary. And that is one key reason why I am able to move on and not dwell in the past. I live for the present and look towards the future.
So don’t tell me you need hell a lot of time to move on, it is your choice whether or not to be trapped in your past. Don’t ask how I can be mostly unaffected by the ghosts of my past, I simply know what I want, set my heart and mind to it and work towards it. You should too.
Yuting
